[time-nuts] Determining Time-Nut infection severity

[Bill Hawkins]

OK, this is an interesting problem, but don't take anything I say
seriously, unless, of course, the shoe fits.

Consider the end stages of TNI. You have acquired everything that
can be acquired. Nothing holds any secrets from you, and so there
are no challenges left. Agreed, some of us will run out of money
or space before we reach that state. The last question may be,
"What happens if I compare three hydrogen masers for a full year,
to ascertain the affects of gravity on hydrogen masers?"

In almost all cases, your wife (collecting big things is a
testosterone-induced behavior) will be beside herself with worry
about how to recover the money you squandered on your collection
when you die. Her only recourse may be to call a junk collector
and pay to have it all removed, especially the stuff in rented
storage lockers.

The problem of testosterone-induced hoarding behavior (if that
fits) is that basements, rooms, and storage lockers fill up. By
hoarding, you withhold interesting things from beginning time-
nuts -- people who have questions but no equipment with which to
find answers.

If you expect the value of your hoard to increase, consider that
you are subject to the rate of technological change. You'll be
lucky to get 10 cents on the dollar for the bleeding edge stuff
you bought. The nostalgia affect peaks and dies as the old folks
die. On top of that, time is an esoteric field. Put something up
on eBay and you'll be very lucky to get 100 people looking at it.

So do your loved ones (if that fits) and the next generation of
time-nuts a favor and disperse your collection. If it's museum
quality, donate it to a museum (if you can find one that will
take it - you won't be alone). Larry Ware on Jack's Boat Anchor
list would sell stuff at low prices to the guy who wrote the best
story about what he'd do with it.

The problem of dating the tombstone is easily solved. First, you
pick a time to die and work it out with your relatives so that no
one will stop you -- perhaps because you didn't get rid of your
junk. Then you pick a means of death that can be started by an
electrical signal, like a solenoid-driven knife that severs the
thread suspending a sword far above your heart.

Finally, you set up a count-down clock that will provide the
signal. Now you can tell the engraver what to put on your
tombstone. You are relieved of the uncertainty that goes with
not knowing when you will die. Your loved ones can get bank loans
based on what's in your will. It's a win-win situation, as long
as the sword doesn't miss.

Happy Halloween,
Bill Hawkins